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Fanfiction, Rated G
Fanfiction, Rated PG
Fanfiction, Rated PG-13
Peach Creek Award

The Wizard Of Ed
Chapter 3
Written By Beansie 

Nazz and Rudolph walked for some time without saying a word to each other. They went through towns without stopping for directions once. Rudolph seemed much more intelligent than a normal dog.

Once upon leaving the villages and entering the countryside, glazen with fields of candy corn, Nazz finally decided to try and break the ice.

"So, have you ever been to Ruby City?" Nazz asked.

"No," Rudolph answered.

"Oh," Nazz nodded. "Ah man! I forgot to get somethin' to eat!"

"Don't worry 'bout it, Nazz! You're in Peach Cream! Candyland! You're walkin' on lunch right now!"

"You the road?"

"Yeah, sure, why not?"

"You think I'd get in trouble?" Nazz asked.

"I don't know," the dog shrugged. "Only one way to find out."

"Yeah," Nazz nodded. "Shoot! Which way do we go, Rudolph?"


"I said which way do we go? There are three ways!" Nazz pointed to where the roads forked off.

"That way!" a voice came from in the candy field.

"What did you just say?" Nazz called into the corn crop.

"Nothin', why'd ya say that?" Rudolph asked.

"Not you. Someone in the field," Nazz said, turning once again to the origin of the sound.

"Who would be in afield?"

"A farmer," Nazz said.

"Look Nazz, I can smell a person a mile away and I'll gladly tell you there is only you, I and a cornfield," Rudolph looked up at Nazz, but she wasn't there. "Hello! I was talking here!"

Nazz made her way through the field, looking for the person who had directed them. In case there were any more forks in the road, they would most likely know where to go.

"HELLO?" Nazz called out, but met only her echo. "Hello? Is there anyone out there?"

"Hello!" There it was again! Nazz was sure of it.

"There you are!" Rudolph hollered up at her. "Where do you think your goin'? You are gettin' out of here right now even if I have to drag your sorry-"

"Shut it, Rudolph," Nazz hissed. She crept forward, pushing two corn stalks out of her way. She stopped, however, and gaped up at a scarecrow on a pole.

The scarecrow seemed almost...familiar. It was a tall figure, stuffed with straw of course. It had two eyes that couldn't focus on the same thing at once: one was looking to the left and the other to the right. It was dressed in farmer's attire and had one large, hairy eyebrow.

"AAGGHH!" Nazz fell back onto the ground. She knew this person! She had seen him every day she could remember! Everyday always the same! The same stupid smile, the same stupid run, the same stupid-

"Hello! Do you have any peanut shells?" the scarecrow asked her. She screamed again. The same, stupid voice!

"I...uh...he-ello," Nazz shook with fear. Maybe this was all a dream! A hallucination! Yeah! That was it! A hallucination! If she just calmed down and played along, it would all be fine!

"WAIT!" the scarecrow screamed and tried to focus on her. Suddenly, his focus left and the strange, bewildered look planted itself back on his face.

"My name is Nazz," Nazz tried to began as smoothly as was possible. "And this is sort of my guard dog, Rudolph. He is taking me to Ruby City. Wanna come?"

"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..." the scarecrow began drooling.

"Come on, Nazz. Don't waste your time with this dork. We gotta get to Ruby City!" Rudolph stated.

Nazz turned back to face him so fast, she made her neck crack.

"Ow," she massaged it. "So do you wanna come or not?"

"Only if you have peanut shells," the scarecrow snapped.

"Well, I'm sure we could find some," Nazz said.

"Find what?" the scarecrow asked.

Nazz blinked twice. This guy was dumber than she had originally thought.

"Find...the road," Nazz smiled.

"Uh...ok," the scarecrow agreed.

"Oh come on!" Rudolph complained.

Nazz quickly untied the scarecrow and the three made their way out of the cornfield. Nazz grabbed a cob of candy corn on the way out.

"You sure you should do that?" Rudolph asked.

"If the farmer doesn't notice his scarecrow missing, you tink he's gonna miss one cob of corn?"


"What's your name?" Nazz asked the scarecrow.

"What's a name?"

"What's a name? What's next? What's a brain!" Rudolph laughed.

"Ignore Rudolph. His fleas are just getting to him," Nazz replied.

"My- HEY!"

"So what do we call you then? Scarecrow?"



"What's that?"

"Wait!" Nazz snapped her fingers. Of course! The most simple name for the most simple person-


"Ed?" the scarecrow asked.

"Yeah! That's your name from now on! Got that, Ed?" Nazz turned to face him.

"Uh...ok," Ed smiled.

Oink! Oink! I am a lizard! Oink!